Day 33: someone who really hurt you.
To be honest, it was my first bf Howie. I met him November 2005 and we became official on 2/14/2006 (WTF right???). I was a senior in HS and he was 22 so I think the gap made a slight difference in experiences/opinions/beliefs. But obviously since he was my first BF, I was in that emotional state of high infatuation/puppy love. I poured my all into him…emotionally, mentally and financially. I was extremely happy. Unfortunately, not even a month of being together he ended up cheating on me…twice. I was so distraught. My trust was shattered and I was never able to trust him. I think that’s what made the rest of our relationship not-so-great because I was constantly paranoid that he might cheat again. When the slightest hint came I would always interrogate him and it would be exhausting. I felt as if it was a constant cycle. Throughout our relationship (after his affairs), he didn’t physically sleep with other guys but he did the whole cyber sex thing with multiple guys. What I am most upset at is the fact that I still stayed with him for an entire year even though I knew how much he was hurting me. I did end up breaking up with him…and it was on our anniversary (2/14/2007).
What I regret is not breaking up with him as early as possible because I missed out on other amazing guys. I think some of you know who you are.
